User blog:BeaNOwl/Rhonda's Unexpected House Party

 Rhonda's Unexpected House Party 

Bea as '''Rhonda. Crumbs as Audrey. Jewel as Diana'. Mittens as Cynthia. Pillow as Judith. Peanut as Vi (Viola). Spot as Tina. Dot as Hilary.'' ''Marina as Tatum. Blossom as Michelle. Holly as Buffy. Pix E. as Priscilla. ''


 * So began what started as Rhonda's first date night with Devin, or so she thought. In front of the mirror Rhonda saw nothing but incredible imperfection.


 * "Why can't my hair be naturally perfect? It's almost like every girl has to be prettier than me. All I ask is for tonight to work out. Is that too much to ask for?"


 * Rhonda felt it useless to talk to her mirror like a human being who could understand her. At least a mirror could not disagree with what she had to say though. Was it weird for her to have a more meaningful conversation with a hanging glass than her own girlfriends? Who cares. It was Friday night, and time with Devin was going to be heaven.


 * Okay, now what to do with her hair thought Rhonda. She turned around in her bathroom and scanned the accessories lying on the shelf. I think a scrunchie might be saying I am too comfortable with you. A headband is sweet but too innocent. You can't go wrong with a bow though. Which color? 


 * "Black. Why? It's dangerous, of course," Rhonda knew she picked the right choice.


 * Even with the bow, Rhonda only found dismay looking into the mirror again. I'm just going to throw a large hat on and call it a night. There was no time for a second judgment, the door bell rang. Devin isn't supposed to be here until nine...


 * Her feet paced down the stairs to the front door where she thought Devin had probably just arrived early. With an excited jerk she opened the door.


 * "Devin you're ear--" she stopped mid-sentence. It wasn't Devin.


 * "Hope I'm not too early, Rhonda."


 * Oh, this is perfect. What is -she- doing here? How do I get rid of her? Panic, panic, panic.


 * "Are you talking in your head again, Rhonda?" she said.


 * The blonde quirky girl who just barged into Rhonda's house was Tina, her close but intrusive friend. Although a girl with good intentions, Tina never seemed to get the hint. This hint was to get out, and fast. Rhonda faked a welcoming smile while discreetly signaling to the door. Maybe she'll get the hint, and leave. Keep smiling, Rhonda.


 * "Why are you smiling like a freaky dentist? And I'm not leaving, put your hand down. Hey, where's the decorations? The place looks dreary," Tina butted in.


 * "Decorations for what? And why are you here?!"


 * Tina almost felt offended, such a tone Rhonda was using. The entry hall was absolutely barren of any festive decoration of the sort. This was not what Tina was expecting. Rhonda however tapped her fingertips against the door, waiting for Tina to decide to head back out the door.


 * "This is just sad. How is the party going to be a hit when your house looks it's ready to hold a funeral?"


 * The question Tina posed gave Rhonda a ghostly white face, almost exaggerated. Please tell me she's joking. Please tell me she got the wrong house. Please tell me she's not going to comment on my hair.


 * "Why are you wearing a three year old's bow in your hair? You look like Minnie Mouse."


 * "GET OUT. GET OUT RIGHT NOW, TINA!" Rhonda was letting out some major steam now.


 * The tension in the room was thick enough to lay bricks. Tina almost felt like Rhonda was getting a little agitated, but she knew Rhonda would never. Maybe Rhonda was just practicing her comedy routine, she never was a funny tomato though.


 * "You're not a funny tomato, Rhonda."


 * What is wrong with her... why won't she leave? Why did the Glee kids have to graduate... why am I a ginger?! Rhonda let out a bizarre shriek that made Tina cover her ears with her hands. Was Rhonda ... PMS'ing?


 * "Yo! Calm down, okay? I didn't mean to make fun of your house, it's not your fault your parents are the crypt keepers. But you really should bring out some snacks though, the girls aren't going to sit around playing Scrabble."


 * What's wrong with Scrabble? It requires strategy! Rhonda felt like her date with Devin might not run as smooth as she'd have thought. There were two things she didn't like about Tina. First, Tina liked to talk gossip about her to the other girls at school, gossip that wasn't necessarily true. That apparently Rhonda steals everyone's boyfriend, and that Rhonda sometimes blogs lies about the other girls on the internet. And secondly, Rhonda just hated that Tina was a die-hard Katy Perry fan. Why is she such a die-hard Katy Perry fan? I just can't stand her.


 * There was a knock on the door and Rhonda's train of thought was broken.


 * "Rhonda stop talking in your head and answer the door, it's probably one of the girls."


 * Why don't you get out of my house, Tina. Hmm? Hmm?! HMM?! Rhonda turned around and jolted the door open.


 * "Rhonda! Hey, girl! Kisses!"


 * Vi. Little Miss Viola from Viewcreek Drive. Vi was the school's yearbook editor. Everyone made sure to stay on her good side to keep from being burned alive at the end of the year. No one really cared much for her, but they knew better to be friends with her.


 * When does Tina talk to Vi? And I swear I own that top she's wearing. Wait. THAT IS MY TOP!


 * "Why are you wearing my shirt?!" Rhonda hollered.


 * Vi felt so humiliated. Who did Rhonda think she was? Even Tina was surprised in Rhonda's behavior. There goes an untrue rumor about Rhonda in the yearbook now.


 * "Look, loud mouth. Tina let me wear it, you can thank her. Okay?" Vi seemed proud of her arrogance.


 * "Tina, why are you lending people my clothes? Why are you in my closet for?"


 * Tina did not like confrontation, almost as much as she did not like guys who can pull off skinny jeans better than her. She had to pull her act together though, Vi was watching.


 * "I'm a classy girl, Rhonda. Surely you know this," Tina explained.


 * "Even I knew this," Vi interrupted.


 * Even I knew this, even I blah blah. I hate her. Rhonda knew Tina was spouting nonsense again. Classy girls don't show off their spanx to the rest of the class, especially on a Thursday.


 * "Why are you giving away my clothes?"


 * Rhonda just wanted an answer, Tina was dancing around the question like Lady Gaga and a disco stick.


 * Many things were rushing through Tina's head right now. She could answer Rhonda's question. She could insult her hair, or she could return home to watch Teen Wolf she DVR'd for later. No, the party was more important.


 * "Um, well, you see. LOOK OVER THERE! It's Audrey!"


 * Dang it, it is Audrey. How many girls did she invite? Rhonda smiled at Audrey who was walking up the steps to her porch. Who did Audrey think she was? A designer purse that she clearly couldn't afford, and new shoes? Remind me to go shopping with her next time. And by that I mean remind me to have her buy me things. 


 * "Audrey! I see you could make it to the party I had no idea I was throwing!" Rhonda faked excitement.


 * "I had a feeling this was all Tina's idea, she told most of us to expect disappointment so I naturally came to the conclusion you were unaware," Audrey said.


 * Vi smiled at Audrey, "Is that a knock-off, girl?"


 * "Oh, Vi. I am shocked you were invited. You still have friends?"


 * Ouch, Audrey just asked for a photoshopped mustache for that snide comment.


 * "Ha ha ha, Audrey. You make tears cascade from my eyes. Meanwhile don't forget who controls what you look like at the end of the year. You should worship the very ground I walk on."


 * Vi had a lot of nerve, so did Audrey. Rhonda and Tina could not let the cat fight ensue.


 * "Girls, let's take this into the living room, okay?" Rhonda tried to herd them into the next room.


 * [UNFINISHED]